Today’s episode is an addendum to my last episode, number 343 “Dr. George Sheehan: Beginning”. Although not a prerequisite to listening to this, Alot of what I’m going to say about running flows directly from what Dr. Sheehan had to say about taking to the road and lacing up our shoes.
But first, some Latin.
In November of 1660 an English architect by the name of Christopher Wren, gave a lecture to a group of scientists, mathematicians, medical experts and intellectuals in what would become known as'The Royal Society of London for Improving Natural Knowledge”
The Royal Society continues it’s work today, and has as it’s motto the words “Nullius in verba” which is Latin for “take nobody's word for it”. It’s an expression of the determination of the Society to withstand the domination of authority and to verify all statements by an appeal to facts determined by experiment.
I’m bringing this up to you today specifically because, going forward, anything I’ll have to say about running is something you must be suspicious of…and that includes everything that Dr. Sheehan had to say in my last episode.
Nullius in verba: take nobody’s word for it…instead, withstand my authority as the host of this podcast and verify everything that I will say, or have…over the past 11 years, said. To quote the good Doctor: “You are an experiment of one”.
When I say “Nullius in verba” what I’m really telling you to do: is experiment. Try and prove me wrong; try to prove all the experts wrong, make it your mission to take any and all tidbits of information that I’ll present to you here: and test the hell out of them.
That testing: both those occasions where you’ll prove me wrong and those instances where what I’ve said about running coincides with your own findings is where we will come closer to the truth…and to quote the X-Files: “the truth is out there”.
I’m doing alot of quoting today. It’s kinda my thing. I’m a quoter. I quote.
SO, last week we heard from Dr. George Sheehan on the topic of “Beginning” to run.
Let’s review the major points and apply them to what a beginner runner might do…and, for the record, I’m back to being a beginner. Yeah, yeah…I’ve run thousands of miles, hundreds of road races, and 22 marathons culminating with a PR of 4:04:36…whatever, that was the past…as you hear this I weigh a total of 250 pounds, more than I’ve ever weighed before in my life…so, I’m a beginner again. Sue me.
Dr. Sheehans chapter can be summarized by the following points:
Point 1: The first thing you must do, to improve your life is to retrace your steps…or, as I so eloquently quoted Sir Paul McCartney last year: “get back to where you once belonged”.
Point 2: You can only determine who you really are, through your body, and the only way you can get back to where you once belonged is to “go back to the physical self we were before we lost our way”.
Point 3: Where fitness ends, self discovery starts.
Point 4: Our salvation is in the day-to-day living of the athletic life.
and finally
Point 5: Do not be a spectator. Learn to be a good loser.
Now, that’s alot of deep philosophical mumbo jumbo to consider right? You just want to lace up your shoes and run a few miles, maybe a road race once in a while…perhaps a marathon…you don’t have to consider such deep thoughts as “learning who you really are” to be a runner, right?
Wrong.…knowing who we are is the very first step on the road to running…and being.
And I know, I know…you probably think you know damn well who you are…you feel like you’ve got an excellent grasp on that knowledge….
But I don’t….and I’m willing to bet that most of us don’t.
Being a runner is so much more than just being a runner.
And that’s the most important point that Dr. Sheehan….and I for that matter, wish to present.
So prove me wrong. Nullius in verba: take nobody’s word for it.
Allow me to demonstrate.
Where did I mess up? That is, when and where did I come to a fork in the road (SFX) where I lost that running feeling?
For me, it was about 4 years and 9 months ago. When I go back to that fork in the road, at the point where I messed up and “lost that running feeling”…I have a pretty good idea what happened.
And it doesn’t matter what that thing was, many of us have what the French call “Fourchette, route”. The way this manifested itself in my life was to ponder, in an endless loop, the question: WHAT IS THE POINT OF THIS?
I’d be out there, out in the middle of a 5 mile run…thinking to myself:
“Why am I doing this? My life sucks. (which of course it doesn’t)
There’s no benefit to running. (which of course, there is)
This is the last thing I want to be doing right now (which, of course, would have been one of the best things I could have been doing back then).
I give up, I’m done (which, of course, was a mistake).
SO, when I retrace my steps, this is where I was in my life when I came upon le Fourchette, route.
Good, next up. Who am I? I mean, really? And for the matter Who are You?
Each of us has an image of ourselves unaligned with objective perception. That’s to be expected…and perhaps it’s useful to get an opinion from an exo-persona to help you know thy self, but while it is important to know who you are, it’s not so important to know how you’re perceived.
According to Dr. Sheehan (whom I tend to agree with on most things) the way we figure out who we are is for us to go back to being the physical self were were before we came to that friggin’ fork…that place where we lost our way.
Which raises another question? How do we do that?
I guess we could make a comparison of our bodies back then to where we are now…and like it or not, weight has alot to do with that. It’s not just weight of course, it’s cardiovascular health, psychological disposition and muscle mass to name a few, but we have to start somewhere, and weight is a good place to start.
That last time many people saw me…I’ve forgone the days of SteveRunner.tv and selfies, was almost exactly 4 years ago, on April 2nd of 2013, during the Cinco Loco here in Boston. At that time, my body weighed in at exactly 207.8 pounds…so, if we do that math, and I did: I’ve gained 42.2 pounds, give or take a few pounds, since that day. That’s about the equivalent weight of a 5 gallon bottle of water, a mid sized microwave oven, an elephants heart or an average human leg.
I’m not proud of that, but it’s who I am. I have never weighed as much, as I do today, ever in my 55 years of life.
How about you? Maybe you’ve not experienced such a massive increase in your own body weight…but chances are, if you stopped being active, then you might have gained a pound or 30.
Self discovery starts where fitness ends.
Dudes and Dudettes…you, me…all of us have to figure out who we really are. There are not too many requirements made of us as we come into this life…but “knowing who we are” is, or ought to be one of the top three…right up there with “doing no harm” and “loving all creatures great and small…”
The reason why this is important isn’t because it’ll give us a better quality of life….to hell with that. It’s a somewhat selfish life goal to ensure that our bowls are filled with cheesy poofs while we melt and merge into our own personal comfortable “COUCHES OF DOOM”, no…a better quality of life isn’t why knowing ourselves is important….unless, and this is important: UNLESS such quality in our lives is a means to an end for something greater.
And what would that greater purpose be?
I think you know. If you’ve been listening to my rambling diatribes for the past 11 years, you most certainly know.
I posit that understanding who we are and our achievement through physical fitness, is a pathway to a greater purpose in our lives. Doctor Sheehan wrote that “Our salvation is in the day-to-day living of the athletic life.”
When we become healthy, happy animals…we achieve the ability and the responsibility of making the world a better place.
What I’m suggesting here is simple: when you head out for a run, walk, bike ride or paddle today, consider, please: that you’re not acting out of selfishness. Contemplate the possibility that you are acting for the good of the world….the people, the creatures, the flora and fauna, the environment itself…all reaping the indirect benefits that your athletic life is creating.
Nullius in verba: Don’t take my word for it: Let’s make a list.
I’m going to inject an audio pause at this point in the podcast, giving you an opportunity to stop listening to my somewhat annoying voice for a few minutes while you build, in your mind, a list of the benefits to others, that your athleticism could create.
For those of you who cannot run, or prefer another sport or play, it’s the same exercise. Your athletic lifestyle creates positive virtual ripples in the fabric of the world…list for me please 4 or 5 benefits to that world that your athleticism brings forth.
Okay, do you have your list? If you have, you’ve just proven my point.
Here’s my list of benefits that my athleticism, be it from running, walking, hiking or canoeing down the Allagash: will make the world a better place. These may coincidently make the quality of my life better, for myself….but the greater purpose has nothing to do with me.
- I will set a good example for others to live their lives to the top.
- I will reduce the need for my body requiring clinical health care, freeing up resources for others.
- I will be more physically able to help others in need.
- I will reduce my contribution to the creation of carbon dioxide and methane on the planet by walking instead of driving my car and by eating less meat (especially beef). Athletes need protein to build muscles, but fuel themselves with carbs.
- I will overcome my depression, making myself a better more socially engaging husband, stepfather, grandfather, son, brother, co-worker and friend to and for others in my life.
I’m sure your list is alot better than mine, but I think you’ll agree that this little experiment was successful. We’ve just proven that self discovery starts where fitness ends.
The fifth and final major point of Dr. Sheehan’s chapter on Beginning is my favorite:
“Do not be a spectator. Learn to be a good loser.”
I said before that it doesn’t really matter why I stopped running four years and 9 months ago. What matters is that I recognize the change in who I was to who I have become. That’s true for you as well by the way…I may be an experiment of one, but you’re undergoing your own experiment. Why did you stop running? steve@steverunner.com we're in this together...I honestly want to know.
Instead of being a participant in life, I decided to crawl inside of myself and slam the door to what I call my Cave of Anhedonia. I watched alot of TV sitting upon the COUCH OF DOOM and eating those dreaded cheesy poofs while I was in the cave, and on that couch.
I wasn't alone (elephant) but, I probably would have been better off that way.
Outside, in the world, runners were running, walkers were walking, physical beings were using their bodies and living their lives to the top. I just didn’t give a crap, and chose to observe 50 years worth of Classic and Modern Doctor Who Episodes….I mean, man…I love that show, but science fiction isn’t science living.
I was a bad loser. Life didn’t go the way I wanted, so I just said “to hell with it” and became a spectator.
And I tried to escape the Cave of Anhedonia a few times; I even talked about it during the year of “Getting Back to Where I Once Belonged” but still…I had nuthin. No motivation, no inspiration, no will power, no energy, no passion or desire to get back out there.
I know I’m not the only one who has suffered on that couch trapped inside that cave.
And about that “being a good loser thing”. It’s interesting, is it not, that we live in a time where the President of the United States is, for all practical purposes, a living example of what it means to be a “poor loser”. We cannot follow his example.
When things don’t go our way, some of us choose to pout, get angry, withdraw and falter. I”m not talking about the denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance associated with grief…that I understand…I’m talking about what some of us do…or, speaking for myself what I did when I came to that effing fork.
So, we need to learn how to become good losers. We won’t win every race, not everyone will accept us, we won’t always get the job, receive the reward, or, to quote Jagger and Richards:
You can't always get what you want
But if you try sometimes, well, you just might find
You get what you need
Retrace your steps, go back to the physical self you were before you lost your way, where fitness ends, self discovery starts, our salvation is in the day-to-day living of the athletic life, and don’t be a spectator. Learn to be a good loser.
That is Dr. Sheehans advice on beginning again. to which I’ll add: Nullius in verba: take nobody’s word for it…there is a better way to live our lives, and it starts with motion.
FOR THE LOVE OF DOG
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| Indy |
On March 28th, in the year of our Flying Invisible Spaghetti Monster, 2009…8 years ago, a lemon beagle came into our lives whom we named Indiana Jones. My son Matt loved the movies and the fact that Henry Senior named Henry Junior after the dog.
Fat dog so loved the world that we adopted his only begotten sister, that whosoever in him shall believeth in the Red Sox should not perish, but win the World Series. Eva joined our family a year later.
If ever there is a presence in my life that continually teaches me to “live in the present”, it is my fat puppy: Indy and his adorable sister from the same father, Eva. They are so much more than pets and companions, each of them: physical artifacts of joy.
It’s interesting to note how remarkable this is…because, for most of my life: I was not a “dog
person”…that is to say, I didn’t enjoy the company of the species “Canis lupus familiaris”, the way they barked, licked, sniffed, pee’d, pooped and shed. The way they’d jump all over you or chase you down the road. Dogs were annoying, loud, smelly, drooling snarling barking carnivores.
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| Eva |
I didn't get it. Why were so many people enamored with these creatures? Why, through the history of human civilization did we so often establish relationships with the grey wolf and it's ancestors?
There are reasons for that, I know...and of course the dogs of this era were bred to be happy, furry creatures with expressive eyes and floppy ears…a product of intense selective breeding...but that doesn't explain my love for my puppies.
I understand the science…I understand that they don’t think as we do, dogs lack the verbal community required for learned behavior such as thinking….I know that we anthropomorphize their behavior using words that we humans attribute to our own…but, that doesn’t diminish the impact of influence that they induce in our own behavior.
When Indy jumps up on my lounge chair, in the back yard, on a warm summers night, to listen to the Red Sox with me on the radio…his behavior is such that I strongly feel he’s enjoying my company and sharing in my enjoyment of the game, even going so far as to cheer Arroooo when our beloved team scores a run.
When Eva curls up by my feet, under my desk, while I’m on a conference call for work, and falls into a deep snoring sleep…her behavior seems to be that of a loving child, who just wants to be near her Daddy.
Coincidence? Of course it’s just a coincidence…but does that really matter?
I really do love my puppies, and my perception…be it fictional or true: is that they behave as if they love me too…and for my money, that’s enough.
Companionship, devotion, love. and beagle hair all over my clothing…it’s all very real to me…and when you think about it, isn’t this kind of relationship something ethereally magical beyond the realm of science?
I’m all for quantifying and qualifying the experience of canine companionship…but there’s a much more important lesson to be learned here…something has happened to me because of Indy and Eva. I’m a better human being….just by their presence.
And that presence, that being together and exhibiting the behavior of companionship: isn’t that all we can ever really hope for in this world? Sustenance, comfort and protection are never guaranteed: but my puppies love me and I love them: and that’s enough.
I’m Steve Runner, reminding you to Run long and Taper